I think it's OK to be completely honest with God. I mean He knows what we are thinking anyway right? I believe He is looking at us and wondering when are we going to say something. Let it go, get it off our chest and ultimately lay the burden down. Empty the load we are carrying unnecessarily.
So yesterday I had my moment of self pity and grief.
My husband got off the phone with our lender, Nationstar Mortgage (a blog post will be forth coming on this company) and we learned we did not qualify for the HAMP or HAMP 1 loan modification. But if we were willing to send them a wire transfer for $2900.00, they would reconsider some other loan options for us. Sound fishy to you too?
Right away, I told my husband, something isn't right in Denmark on that issue!
And I began to research the company in detail. What I found there and shared with my husband quite literally rocked my world. We are just one of thousands of people who are dealing with this and no one is stopping the process. So I turned to my husband and asked, "What should we do now?"
He responded that we should begin with back up plan B, C, D and every letter necessary to secure a home for us.
It was at this point yesterday and the evening before, I went into melt down mode. My plane had come crashing down, as my brother, reminded me yesterday. I didn't really take that into consideration until later. It made perfect sense! He told me to stop seeing all the collateral damage. See it as a plane crash and you have survived. Now that you have realized you are still alive, process this like you would if you were in an actual plane crash.
First of all, don't panic. I did panic. I felt the air removed from my lungs and couldn't breath. But what he said made sense.
In a plane crash as a survivor if you want to make it out alive, you don't panic. You begin working things out one at a time.
We are in survival mode now and we needed to begin to develop what needed to happen next to ensure our survival. In a plane crash, you need to figure out shelter, food and water requirements while waiting for help to arrive. You never leave the crash site, unless danger is imminent.
So in our case, until the notice comes for us to leave the site, we stay put but work on shelter issues first. For us, it's finding a suitable shelter. We are working with a property management company now to find us a rental home nearby that is within our range of monthly payment options. We actually found several ready to move into NOW and they are willing to work with us regarding our less than stellar credit now thanks to this lending nightmare they forced us into .
Once that is settled, then it's simply the process of moving and friends have been amazing as well as neighbors who have volunteered to help out in anyway we need. We simply now need to stop worrying about other what ifs, that the enemy is sending our way because you know what, there is NOTHING God can't do in all this.
He could have made the mortgage company approve our loan, but in the end, we've found so many homeowners are being subjected to the whims of monthly payment increases and more hoop jumping and quite frankly, I'm a bit too old and seasoned to keep doing this.
At some point you wonder just how many times do you need to walk around the plane wreck and believe that the plane can't fly anymore?
Unless we accept the wisdom and revelation that comes from answered prayers from God, I will keep walking around that plane looking for possible ways to get it back up in the air, while God simply shakes His head and waits patiently.
At some point, I figured it out last night and realized, "Hey look! I survived!!! Time to find a way out of here, and with God's help it is definitely a possibility!!"
So when you go through something that feels way over your head and you question God's Hand in all of it, remember Job's wise words when he lost all that he had and what he did in the midst of his own plane crash, Then Job rose and rent his robe and shaved his head and fell down upon the ground and worshiped. And said,"Naked (without possessions) came I (into this world) from my mother's womb, and naked (without possessions) shall I depart. The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; blessed (praised and magnified in worship) be the name of the Lord!" ~ Job 1: 21-22.
In God's own time, He will rescue us, but we will continue to keep our eyes on Him and remain in our walk with God by our side. The journey isn't over yet and the harvest is coming. Sunday is near and soon it will be time to rejoice in all things.
4 comments:
Yes, be honest. See Exodus 5: 22, 23. But don't stop there!
Battle on my friend, you will be victorious. Remember, you are on the winning team, Gods team.
Several years ago we went through a horrific setback where investments were concerned (along with everyone else). The losses and/or reversals hurt. Yet I found myself laughing, knowing that what had taken us by surprise, certainly hadn't taken God by surprise. It was then hubby & I took the phrase "It is what it is" as our tether. It helped to let go, and to move on. We've recovered, and recovered well. And we're still laughing.
Praying peace, strength & humor for you.
Hugs,
Kathleen
Excellent post! Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
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